Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Journey To The Past

I am really bad at math and science, just thought I'd let you all know. I swear I am going to fail both those classes. At least you don't have to be good at those two subjects to be a music teacher. At least that's what my dad says and he is a music teacher. That's what I want to be when I am older. Singing and pretty much anything to do with music is what I am good at, so that's what I have decided to do with my life. Or become a a diagnostician, but I am bad at math and science so that probably wont happen as much as I would like it to. Anyway, I am very bored right now. I should be studying for the test I have in english, considering that this is my only free period today. But I just can't concentrate on vocab at the moment. My mind is miles away from school right now, it is somewhere in northern Russia....

Yesterday my friend asked me if I could go anywhere int the world, where would I go? I have not been able to get that question out of my mind. I knew instantly where I wanted to go, Russia to that little town where I was born and where I live for the first year of my life. Most people would think I am crazy for wanting to go somewhere so cold, whats in Russia anyway? Well, my birth family, it's were I came from. I wish so much that I could go to Russia and live the way my birth mother had and to see the things she saw. I want to experience what my life would have been like if I had not been adopted, if only for a week and even if it wasn't really the way it would have been. More importantly I want to meet my birth mother, that is if she is still alive. Or maybe my brother, who would now be 21. I know that this is a goal that I may never reach, but I can try. Some day I will. I swear (but not to God because I go to a Catholic scholl..Lol...) that I will. And I'll write a blog about it! I think I'll call My Journey to the Past...


See, my theory is that where you have come from is not really who you are as a person, but it is a good place to start your journey in finding out who you are and who you want to become. So, how can I figure out who I really am without knowing where I came from? Where you come from may have nothing to do with who you are at all, but I still want the chance to explore my biological family history. I want to be there, in the place I was born just to see what it's like. And if I ever get the chance to I want to tell my birth mother thank you for loving me enough to give me up and for giving me a chance at a better life. A life that she may not have been able to provid me with. That is the greatest gift have ever recived...Life, and a chance to have the best life possible.

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