Friday, September 26, 2008

Random Facts About My Life

Lots has happened since I've last written, maybe not interesting stuff, but stuff. Well, on Friday me and Maya4Life went to our old middle school. Talk about a blast from my past. I needed to have Mdog fill out an application for me, but he wasn't there. :( But we did see our old french teacher who we haven't seen since 7th grade because she has been in France on an exchange. It was great to catch up with her, she is really nice. Anyway, then we were going to got to the football game but V told us it was cancelled (which it wasn't!) But then we just watched a million episodes of House. I love House, he is like the coolest thing on TV. He's hilarious! Anyway, then I went to my homecoming dance on Saturday night. That suck so bad, let me tell you! The music was horrible, it was 1000 degrees in the gym, and it smelt so bad. IDK why. It was not fun, no body liked it. I wasn't going to go anyway, but my mother and grandmother wouldn't shut up about it. They were all like: "Your never going to make friends this way!" I HAVE FRIENDS, GET OVER IT!!!!! There not all to close, but I have friends. Finally I broke down and said I would go. What a waste of 10$ and a Saturday night.

Monday I had more tests and so starts my boring week all over again. At least today is the last day of school, because we don't have school 2morow! YEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!! I can sleep in! :D :D Yeah, but we get our progress reports in the mail this weekend! Yikes, my grades will probably be the lowest they have ever been. Oh, well I have plenty of time to bring them up. And I will, I swear. Not to God because I go to a catholic school and my conscience will eat away at me if I do. Me and Maya4Life have started calling MP my conscience,because basically that is what he is. Every theology class it is like a major guilt trip about every thing I have ever done wrong in my life. He is my conscience without even knowing it. But I still think he is really nice and I still absolutely love theology.

OMG! I have now been upgrade to the queen of the morlocks in drama! (Random, I know) It is not to much of an improvement, but it is a challenge. And I like a challenge when it comes to acting. I know basically just get to chill with king and order the other morlocks around. It is a role easier to develop then just a morlock, I think. So, drama should be interesting and pretty good. Well, I am sooo glad there is no school tomorrow, and yeah.

Tootles,

MX

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Tests, Tests, and More STUPID TESTS!

I have 5 tests tomorrow, and I am no where thrilled about it. The teachers here have told us that they are only allowed to test us on certain days so we don't have a million tests on one day. There doing a great job at this! Oh, well. I feel ready for most of them. Just gotta do like a 3 hours study session tonight. And it will be such a good feeling to have then all done with by the end of Friday. (But I do have one on Monday. More time to study!) I got my math quiz back today. I failed. Or barely passed, I can't remember. Just for all of you who didn't know, failing isn't something I do often. (Although it may seem like it.) In middle school I got nothing lower than a 94 ad I had never failed anything up until the start of this year. I have no idea why. I'm really gunna need to do better...

Anyway, today in theology MP wrote this quote on the board: "Show me who your friends are and I'll show you what kind of person you are." -Rosa Bolda

This quote sadly, is so true. In the society we live in today, people will judge you and the people that surround you as a whole before they get to know you as an individual. So, if your friends are making the wrong chooses they will assume you are to. Like judging a book by it's cover. If people didn't do this, the world would be a much better place, in my opinion. The meaning of this saying reminds me of something Mdog said to me at conferences. He said he didn't want me to get in the wrong group in high school, assuming that I was in with the wrong crowd last year. He said I needed to get in with a group of people who were as focused on school as I was. Now see, if he hadn't judged us as a whole he would have realized that my friends where into school and they tried there best. And he would have seen that although I my do better in school than some of my friends (I may not have) that that dose not mean they are not as focused on school as me.

Anyway, the moral of the story is just don't judge a person to quickly because you don't know what they have gone through or what their lives are like or even who they are. SO, just get to know then before you assume things, because the things that you may think could be very untrue and hurtful.

See ? I am learning things in theology?

MX4Life

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

What A Day

Yeah, what a day! Everything that could have gone wrong did. But despite that fact I don't feel stressed at all. I only have tests to study for tonight and I am not really all that tired, and I might be able to hang with Maya4Life (and all my real friends) on Friday! I guess you could even say I am in a pleasant mood. Long time since that has been true. I just had a burst of enthusiasm to do my best today, although a lot of things went wrong....

Well first off, you should know that I didn't have theology class and that never makes me to happy about my day. Then I had science first, which is my hardest subject. After that I had a math quiz, which I already know I failed. I suck so bad at testing. I know all the material, but then I test poorly. Kinda like what happends to me at audition time. Gotta work on that to! Anyway...then I sat with sophmores at lunch which is highly looked down upon in this school. I didn't figure this out until after I had finished eating, then I practicaly ran out of the cafe. Finally I couldent gt my locker open, so I had to get the janitors. I have never had issues withmy locker, but today it just woulden'topen, so I am guessing that someone switched the lock. So, I had to get the combo for the loick that was on my looker from outr assistant principal. She scares me. Alot. At least she is going to go back to being a L.A. teacher on Monday! Because I coulden't get my locker open, I missed the whole Key Club meeting, so I wont be able to work at the cancer walk this weekend. What a day!

Despit it, I defied what should have given me the worst headache andf and an even wosre attutude, and still came out with a positive out look on life!

Lets see how long this lasts...

MX

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Today in The Life of MX

Today in the life of Mx, things aren't as complicated and hard as they were yesterday. I have a short day at school today, and only math HW so far. I got to watch House last night and I have theology next, so all is well. I really do think I was tired yesterday and I was worried about how my audition went, so that's why I was in such a crappy mood. And I had a lot of HW, which I finished on time!!


Anyway, about my audition...It went well, but I really do think it could have gone a lot better. I felt so rushed because I had to leave and I only got like 30 seconds to look at the scene I was suppose to read. But maybe because of my impressive stage performance history, the director Will cut me some slack and give me a decent role. Oh, well all the upper class man get the leads anyway and most of them are way better actress's than me. There is always next year, I am getting better at what I do every day, so next year or maybe even the musical is possible to get a lead. I have never really gotten a major role in play, mostly because I only do musicals. Not that I get leads in those either. I'm not bad or anything (I hope!) it's just that when auditions come around, I am never ready. that's something I really need to work on this year.


Anywho....off to theology!


MXinaBETERMOOD

Monday, September 22, 2008

STRESSFUL DAY

Do you ever just want to scream, or cry? Yeah, that was my day today. I have no idea why, but every seemed harder than it should have been. It was just very stressful for some unknown reason. The work load wasn't even that hard. I guess everyone has those days...

I did audition for the play today. It went well, but I could have been better. I can always do better, or at least that's what I belive like all the time. I dn't know why. I guess you could say I am an over achiver, at leas I was in middle school. It jsut seems to dang hard here!!!!!!!! I feel way to stressed today. Every thing is so complicated. I don't wnat to come off like life is crap and I have the hardest life ever, but it just feels like that sometimes, although it is not entierly true. have no consentration for anything today, which makes math homework impossible. I have yet to do any homework. Which is not going to make my wicked hard teaches pretty PO'ed. Oh, well none of them like me anyway. Well, MP does. His class was the only none stressful part of my day.I am really tired today, and I think that is the source of all this streddfulness. I really need to get more sleep, which is kinda hard because I never have time to sleep. TO MUCH to do and worry about right now. I am so close to a freaking mental break down here! I am sick of my life, and I don't know how much more crap I can take. I am tryng so hard to do my best and make verything work, but isn't doing anything. I don't know how much more I can take.....

MXStressedToTheMAX

Friday, September 19, 2008

SURVING HS, THIRD WEEK

So I have ended my third week of high school! And with no detention! I am very proud of myself for that and the fact that I actually have people to sit with at lunch.

I am still not sure about how I feel being at this school. I love the theology and religion so much, but a lot of the other aspects of this school I hate with a passion. So I don't even know if I like it here or if I hate it. It is so confusing. I wish there was just a letter you got in the mail or something telling you exactly where you should be in your life. But unfortunately, there isn't so we have to just figure out these things for our selves. But I am not sure how to figure out this dilemma especially since I am torn between my heart and my religion. Shouldn't those two things work hand in hand? For the religious out look on everything, I want to stay at this school, but my heart is still telling me I don't belong. I mean the education, the mission, and the theology at this school is good, but I fell like there is something missing other than my social life. I have no idea what that is. I don't know a lot of things right now. I do't know what I want or how I am even feeling. I just wish with my whole heart that I could figure out everything in my life that has a question mark after it. All in good time I suppose. I guess I've gotta take it one step at a time....

I'm goin' to bed.

Peace out to all readers,

MX

Thursday, September 18, 2008

DRAMA

What can I say about drama? Well, the fist meeting of the drama society was yesterday. It was amazing!!!! I is the only thing I like about this school, other than theology and MP. We are doing The Time Machine for out fall play. I am not a fan of this particular play, well what I've heard of it anyway. But I suppose I can give it a try. Let me tell you, drama here is all jokes, all the time. I mean they are serious about the production, but everyone is always cracking a joke or turning something the director says into a joke. There is a lot of funny people in drama, which makes for a great time. And our director is really funny too. He goes right along with the jokes. Lots of laughter here people, which I definitely need after a long day of school. W did a lot of improv games yesterday, which is also something I enjoyed. I also made some friends to hang with. That was good, ecspecailly considering the fact that drama and theology are the only things that are gunna get me through this school unless I make friends

HAHA! Talking about theology class, I jsut came from there! It was sooooo funny. MP makes me laugh. He has a way of telling a story that is just really funny and he's so nice. Our class always gets into really fun and funny class discutions, usually way off topic. As much as we get off topic, I am learning things about my religion and mission of my school every day. I think I am beginning to apresate what this school stands for and what being a person for God and others really means.( Although I still don't enjoy this school or even know if this is the best place for me.) WOW! Big step! And it's all because of theology and MP. Who would have thought that religion would be my favorite class although I dislike goingto church. The wonders one teacher can do....

Drama and Theology ROXZ! :)

MX

P.S.

I got an A on my math test!!!!!

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

PICTURE DAY

Yes, today is the dreaded picture day. I just had mine done and the lady made me do this wicked weird full body pose. Hopefully it doesn't look to stupid. I am not buying any pictures this year so, it only really matters if the head shot for the yearbook looks good. I think it will turn out okay. I mean my hair looked good enough and I don't think I was doing that nerdy smile of mine that shows my bad teeth which desperately need braces. At least I don't have to worry about how my cloths looked cuz I was wearing our stupid uniform. Ya know, my sisters school had a dress down day on their picture day.

Anyway, I have gone from straight A's to failing two quizzes. Yes, I failed both my first math AND my science quizzes. And progress reports come out in 2 weeks! I know, it is only the first quizzes, but they can really bring down your grade here. At least I go a B on the math quiz I had today and I feel good about the french and English quiz I had on Friday. I rally hope I did okay. I have never failed a quiz before. I have never failed anything before! If this had happened in middle school I would have been freaking out. But I am not to worried about it at the moment, which is weird cuz I need to do my best in high school. At least I'm trying...

Going to take another quiz,

MX

Monday, September 15, 2008

NO SCHOOL!

One good thing about catholic school: we have a lot more days when we don't have to go to school and public school does. I mean we have no school on all the Holy and saint days. We don't have school today because it is the states religious school confrence or something. And guess what I had to do today? Homework! What a fun day off! Why do I have so much HW? I don't get it. I mean it never helps me understand anything any better! Oh well, again that's what you get for taking all honors, MX. Goodness, why did I do that? I REALLY don't know. I don't like HW. I Like music. I know that's random, but I am listening to iTunes right now. I think I would go crazy without music. It is such a HUGE part of my life. I mean, I am a singer. I love to sing, it is just an amazing feeling being up on stage preforming, or even just singing in the shower. Sing is an escape from the rest of this confusing world, the same as listening to music or writing is. It is my self expression. Heck, music makes me who I am. Or some of what makes me who I am. Now what's the rest?...

Till I have more to write,

MX

Sunday, September 14, 2008

MOTHMAN?

Has anyone ever heard of the Mothman, or seen the movie about him/it? I just saw it and the idea of the Mothman fascinates me. If you haven't heard of the Mothman, he is said to be a black, human/moth thing with glowing red eyes. Cool right? Well, I thought so. (well, in a creepy, weird way.) He is said to be a myth like bigfoot or something, but no one has proven he dosen't exist. He seems to show up in times of tragedy, like when the Silver Bridge in Pleasent Point, West Virgina broke and 46 people died. Or when the Twin Towers crumbled to the earth on 9/11. People have said to have seen him in times like these and the days folowing up to things like these happening. There has been numoreus sightings of him, but were those just a hoax? Is this myestrious Mothman really a super natural being? I really wish I knew. And is this Mothman thing good or bad? I believe that he is a dark creature who isn't the bad guy because it is also said that he warns people of this tradgedys. Anyway I am doing research into this because it is a mstey that intresst me. I know what your thinking: she's a freak who belives in the "Mothman". Maybe so, but I've had my fill about super natural creatures for today, so I'll stop writing about it And I'm not obsesed,or that weird, this movie that I saw just puzzles me.

Now back to HW!!!

Peace out,

MX

PS

If the Mothman intrests you check this out: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mothman

Friday, September 12, 2008

One Hi Can Make Your Day

People are mean here.You'd think they'd be wicked nice and welcoming, but no. Not all people are earn, but some. I got to school at like 7:20 and barely anyone was here, so (I just sat down ta a random table in the cafe to study for a test. Then this girl sat down with me. She seemed nice and all then she's like freshmen have those two tables over there. And nobody was even there! Gosh, I can sit where ever I want and if somebody has a issue with that then that's just too bad!
But as I said, not everyone is bad. MP is nice. He is the only one that makes me fell welcome at this school, he is actually very kind to me. He is my theology teacher. He is a really good teacher and he is really passionate about what he dose. I was having a wicked bad day yesterday cuz I did bad on a test and I was following the wrong schedule and skipped two classes. I just was not happy and I did not want to be at school. He asked mewhat was wrong when I was rushing to class when I figured out my schedule, so I told him. And I was really upset cuz I did not feel good and I just hated everybody and everything. But he just told me it was going to be alright and that it was okay. He made my day just by saying a few words to me. The rest of my day I felt better and I couldn't wait for his class, and I enjoyed it. I think he is my hero just saying hi. (which he dose every time I see him in the hall) God bless him.
MX

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

School is...

School gives me a headache. I hate it. Fixing my computer also gives me a headache, and I still haven't fixed my stupid iTunes yet! I am going to go crazy without my music. Yeah, I deleted all the music on my iPod and now it won't let me put any of it back on.

I have a hour break from the boring thing we call school, so i guess I'm writing on my blo, finally. ( I should be doing homework.) I still am not enjoying school at all. My moms in love with my school though. It was parent's night. Scary thought. My mom, talking to my teachers, about ME! That's my worst nightmare. Anyway she loves my school, and I hate it. But she says that she could never pass high school now. My dad dose too. Dose that mean we are smarter than our parents? Sometimes I think it dose. Although i don't like school, am realizing that the education here is good. It is challenging and the teachers here are almost like professes. But the social aspect of it (for me anyway) sucks. I have no friends, no relationships to teachers, and I don't like the atmosphere of this school. It is to uptight and strict, not open enough.

I miss middle school, as lame as I may seem for saying that. I miss all my teachers, my friends, my classes. I felt so comfortable at my middle school and with all my teachers. I miss how much fun it was. Yes, there was a lot of work, but it had a laid back, fun atmosphere. I miss it. I really do. At least the weekend is kinda almost here, and I Can hang with my friends. Maybe my cousins too. (Yes, I love to hang out with my cousins. We all go to church together on Sunday and then we go to each others house. It's nice to be with family on Sunday.) Maybe I'll go see a movie with Maya4Life on Friday. I saw Batman and the Disaster Movie last Friday. They both were really good, but Batman rocks! I also got to walk around down town with my sis. That was funny, we both Had different uniforms on and people were staring at us.

OMG! I got like a wicked bad grade on my first amthh quiz. I barely got a B, i think. Oh wel, only the first quiz. Anyway, I am doing well in everything else. Well, I shoul do HW. Thanxz for actually reading this blog!

YOU ROCK!

4everwrittingthisblog,

MX

Friday, September 5, 2008

SURVIVING HISH SCHOOL

I HAVE ACTUALLY SURVIVED MY FIRST WEEK OF HIGH SCHOOL! :0 :O I have no IDEA how I did it at all. I thought I would have already had a mental break down or at least a detention. But the only trouble I've gotten into is people telling me that my collar botton is the only one that can be unbottoned. Shocker. I guess it wasn't totally horrible. I mean, I guess I have at least one friend and I already have straight A's. How did that happen, ALREADY? Well, I guess we have had at least 2 quizzes in each class. Thats what you get for taking all honors your freshman year. I am just so glad it is Friday and I can ACTUALLY wear what I want. It is amazing. I'm serious after wearing the same uniorm everyday, you can't wait to burn it! I don't know how I am going to be able to deal with that all 4yrs! At least I don't have to pick out my outfits in the morning. I just still don't understand about going to this school. I don't like it, but I don't think I'm gunna die from it either. Is this were I am suppose to be? It's what my heart is telling me to do, but then agian my heart is one screwed up organ. I am not sure were I am suppose to be, or what I want. Maybe I will be able to figure it out, but how. Life is just so full of questions ad not enogh awsners. TGIF!!!
Peace,

MX

Thursday, September 4, 2008

AND SCHOOL BEGINS

OMG! I am already on my THIRD day of school! wow. And you should see my homework load! double wow. And yes after 3 days, I still feel the same way about this school as before. But I am really just trying to accept it for what it is, ya know? But it's hard to do that. I mean school is so dull. All I do is work, eat, and more work. I have no social life at all. I guess I have friends, but they're more like just people I sit with at lunch. I kinda feel like a zombie. Just floating thought each day, doing what I'm suppose to be doing. Then I go home and do the same thing. Is this how high school is suppose to feel like? I don't think so, but it still dose. At least most of my teachers are nice. My math teacher looks like Mark, from RENT, and he seems pretty nice. My history teacher is just plain harsh. He is all like "I am just trying to prepare you for the real world, and the really world isn't always fair." Blah Blah Blah. Yeah, I know the real worlds harsh, but could you lighten up just a bit? He is a pretty good teacher though. My science teacher is nice, young and fun. That's about it. Her class is to easy so I am going to honors Physical Science. Mdog taught me well. He's my old science teacher, and his class was great. Boy do I miss is 5 page long tests compared to this easy crap I''m taking. My religious teacher is also nice to, he is very gangster, in a way. He says 'ight, like every ten seconds. hes cool. My choir director is also very good, but I had to sing for him this morning. He's all like you are an alto, aren't you? And I'm like NO! I am a saprono. But at 8:00 in the moring my voice is not in it's full range yet. So, I am in the saprono section of choir. I still am not sure of what to make of my L.A. teacher yet. In good time though I should be able to tell you what he's all about.

So, for the most part school isn't great, but it isn't exactly crap either. It's dull. And boring. ANd I have no friends. AND I have lots of hw. Not to complain or anything. Well, I guess school is pretty crappy. But I just have to accept it for what it is and do my best and hopefully things will get better. I thiunk I might be ablre to survive this school for awhile. But when i fel like I'm gunna die at this school, I'll let ya'll know. (That should be in 2 weeks or so.) But till then the all powerful and mighty MX is just gunna have to hang in there...

Tootles!

MXatschool


Monday, September 1, 2008

THE HARDSHIPS OF MY LIFE

OMG! 2morow is school! I am soo nervous and upset that I am actually going to this school that I could cry. There are other reasons I could cry to. I just am not to happy with my life at the moment. It's not all bad, but it's just kinda confusing right now. See, my parent's are divorced. Have been ever since I was like 5 and I think it's harder now then it ever has been. Going into high school and all, our schedules for who we will be with everyday is just weird. Also, with my dad working numerous jobs, it also makes it more confusing. I don't blame him at all. He only wants the best for us. But I just wish somtimes that they weren't divorced. It would be easier, but then agian it would be hell in my house with them fighting. And they both have found wonderful people to spend the rest of their lives, even though they never get married agian. I am glad they are both ahppy (for the most part), but I just wish there was an easier way to do all this and make it work for all of us. But I guess we are just gunna have to work it out like everything els in life. Most kids whos parents are divorced learn how to deal, but being adopted (yeah me and my sis were adopted from Russia) and having divorce parents has a harder emotional aspect to it. It is just hard toover come emotional things for me. But hopefuly with grea family and friends by my side I can work throught this dificult time in my life.
Later y'all and thanxz for reading. Oh, and wish me good luck at school!!
MX4LIFE